Self Destruct
by REstricted-Access13
Summary: The sequel to 'Superior'. After being left in the Chamber of Secrets, Natasha needs to understand what she must do. Sacrifice her best freind? Or save the man that she loves? SS x OC Rated M for later chapters.
1. Prologue

'_Disconnect and self destruct one bullet at a time... what's your rush now everyone will have his day to die.'- The Outsider [Apocalypse Remix] A Perfect Circle_

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><p>The darkness suffocated; the empty eyes of the dead basilisk stared me in the face. I smirked wildly and threw a handful of water into the eyes and laughed when the crash resembled the sound of a hissing snake. Seems as though Riddle's 'snake' wasn't enough to hold Harry back.<p>

I doubt anyone is going to find me down here, and I'll probably need to find my own way out of here and find Severus. He was probably going to do something he'd rather me not knowing.

"Natasssssha? Why ssssso sssssad?" I gasped and spun around in a circle, nothing was around me except for the... basilisk? I turned slowly back to the skeleton to see it raise its bony head and smirk toothily at me. "Could it be that my young daughter wissshessss to sssssee me?" I glared at the over sized snake and hissed back.

"You wish; there is nothing that I want from you Marvolo. You killed my mother and then had the decency to send me to Azkaban for it. You aren't my **father**." I forced the hated word out of my mouth.

"Oh, you break my heart with thosssse awful wordssss. Pleasssse, come with me. I can make you powerful than any other witch on thisssss Earth!" the snake slithered forward until it was nose to nose with me. I smirked.

"As long as I am powerful enough to kill you than I'm fine with it!" the snake chuckled and slithered back to its original place of rest and laid its head down.

"You have no idea what it feelsss like to loossssse sssssome one ssssso clossssse," and the voice left; I realized the weight of those words and glared at the now empty eyes of the basilisk.

"And how could you know something like that huh? I lost my mother to you! COWARD!" The water rushed on both sides of the long strip of concrete strip that I stood on and the loud hiss echoed through.

"Shishishi..."

"Where are you Marvolo?"

"You want to get out don't you? This place is quite rotten; I'll give you a choice. You bring the boy who lived to me, and I'll let Severus live."

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><p><em>Oh ho, ho! It seems as though we've got some Angst goin' ons now don't we? I think I've done a rather good job with all the goofy shit I've been going through at school (excuse me)<em>


	2. Of All Things

**Chapter One**

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><p><em>'<em>Come <em>with <em>me...<em>'<em>____

_ 'Live with me.'_

_ 'I'll give you the power to protect him... Just give me the word and give me the boy...'_

_'_In your dreams', I think as I run down the stretching corridors of Hogwarts. I look out each one of the windows, expecting to see that of sunlight or winter yet all that I saw was Hagrid's hut on fire.

"Severus!" I yell only to receive no sound. "Sev-"

"Natasha!" I turn and see Harry running towards me, his face was flushed and sweat trickles down his face. "It's the Death Eaters! Snape killed Dumbledore!"

The world went silent.

Severus?... You?

Why?

You killed Dumbledore?

"No..." I shake my head and run even faster down the corridors to see Severus and a few other Death Eaters along with Draco running down the hill into the forest. "SEVERUS!" the dark haired potions master turns slightly and his dark coal eyes widen.

"Natasha?" I run to him and slap him across the face, tears spilling down my face.

"How could you? The only family I had left? You _killed_him!" I cry and hit him in the chest. His eyes betrayed emotion that night. And emotions that I never thought would be revealed on his face. Regret, hurt, and heartache.

"I'm sorry, forgive me." I glare into his eyes but I couldn't bring the words out of my mouth. It had seemed to easy in my head, those words were so easy to utter to my father. I could never say it to this man, not even in the worst of times.

"I-I... I..." he turns his head away from me.

"Say it, say that you hate me. It won't change anything, it'll only prove me right once more."

"I love you..." his dark eyes flicker to mine and his leans forward ever so slightly to press a gentle and chaste kiss to my quivering lips.

"Thank you..." and he was gone.

The days seemed to pass then. The joy left me, the strength left me until I found myself in a hospital bed on nothing but life support, and the guilt ate at my being everyday. At first I thought it was because he was gone, but then it occurred to me that it was what Marvolo had said to me.

'_Just __give __me __the __word __and __give __me __the __boy...__'_

But I couldn't do that to Harry, handing him over to that raving lunatic would be like completing murder. But- I was already guilty by association and now that I was even considering the possibilities that says something.

How could I have let it come to this?

To the point where I was crawling on the floor like some desperate worm?

Was I really going to let myself ponder ways to get Harry Potter to Voldemort?

Yes, yes I was.

I searched for him for nights on end. Looking around ever corner, expecting to see that familiar glint of rounded glasses and lightening scar. But he'd disappeared; right off of the face of the planet.

I didn't know what to think just then, and when I hadn't found him for a month I stopped trying and returned to Hogwarts expecting to see the familiar Potter on campus.

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><p>But my eyes betrayed and even heavier truth.<p>

I let out a gasp.

Hogwarts had been reduced to something like Azkaban... Dementors floating outside of perimeter, children of all ages walking in single file lines and their eyes betraying only fear and rage. I had been gone for so long that I couldn't see the destruction that had been bestowed upon this school I had so dearly cherished. And it was all because of **him**. The fact that I couldn't let him go drew me back to him.

So I ran past the gates and the screaming guards, the scared faced children, and once cheery hallways.

I found him.

Not in the Potions room but in the Great Hall, standing with an almost sick glow. His eyes sunken in, his back straight as a board, his hair longer and touching his broad shoulders, and his skin was pale as the dead. I could imagine touching his skin and it being a cold as ice. His eyes betrayed no emotion this time, but his lip did twitch upward in recognition.

"Severus?"

"Hello, Natasha. I'm glad you could make it."

"Where is Harry, Severus?" the pale man grimaced and looked away from me and into the once cheerful Great Hall. His face was a stone wall and I couldn't break it. His mind held that strong barrier that it always had and I couldn't stop myself. I ran to him, embraced him, kissed him; and he returned everything with the same passion that I did.

I would always be his, but I'd never be able to forgive him, for I didn't know the truth behind his actions. The lost love that he'd recovered in me. That horrible burden that now manifested itself on his heart. I had no idea. But I would find out, and when that time came I would be ready for it:

The full truth.

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><p>I was getting ahead of myself and now that I thought about it I really wasn't ready for the truth.<p>

Why did Snape do this?

Why on Earth did Snape kill Dumbledore, had he really a logical reason to point his wand at his own friend and utter that curse?

I didn't know; so no. He had no reason whatsoever.

Snape was a few feet away from me now, explaining to me all of the changes of Hogwarts. Every new rule made my fist clench, every new curfew made my stomach clench, and every time I looked at the once warm Great Hall I wanted to punch him.

"Nate... Are you even listening to me?"

"How could you do this, Snape?"

"It needed to happen at some point, Dumbledore was being to lenient with these children. I shook my head. "Where did you go Nate?" I looked up into his coal black eyes and saw extreme guilt, hurt, and regret. Some other emotions embedded themselves deep into the lines of his face.

"What do you mean?"

"Us two, hexing each other from one room to another, teaching class together, you spazzing out at the worst of times, you making me **laugh **again?"

"Voldemort happened..." I stood and walked away from him.

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><p><em>updated... I like this one... but the holidays made me too jolly to write too much angst. You know that feeling?<em>


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